Goodbye 2nd post, Hello 3rd post

So! I'm back to Hematology section!

Honestly, it's not really my first time at this post, because this is my temporary post during our unofficial rotation. This was between our first and second post. But generally, it's my first official day here.

Having worked for only 3 days here before and leaving for almost one month, I was a little confused. Hehe. Ma'am Gemma, our staff while ago, was even a little troubled because of us -- to think that I'm the only one who is at least familiar with the routine works here, while my other post mates are completely new in the main lab. Good thing, she's kind and so understanding.

Looking back from the post where we're from, I can't help to smile --  and pout as well. I'm gonna miss Histopathology section. Perhaps it's the best section of all. Though we haven't experience the others yet, I'm pretty sure of it even so.

I'm checking my entries during my stay there, and I just realized something funny…

10/12 Sat 19:49

First time to eat with them. They are the ones who prepared the food.

10/18 Fri 15:43

They are cooking pancakes  =)

10/27 Sun 16:29

I just noticed. I've been eating a lot lately. Next batch for this section, watch out and be ready for a sudden change. =D

Now, have you notice it as well? Hahaha!

Disposition when calling God

"Are you like the Parisian or like the Publican? Are you the one who is knowledgeable about all the laws, and whose prayer is telling that he is a 'good man' comparing himself to the 'sinful man' next to him; or the one who is commonly known as a tax collector hence viewed as abuser, and whose prayer  is telling that he is 'nothing' but a 'sinful man', asking for God's forgiveness?" The homily today says that "The high profile is lowered while the low one is upped."

"God created man in His image and likeness so He will grant his wishes for as long as man admits that he is nothing and He is everything. God will grant man's wishes as long as he asks Him within a particular period of time. God will only answer those who keeps on calling, knocking, asking Him patiently, faithfully and without any hesitations or doubts or second thoughts."

I'm okay now

Got to visit his facebook while ago. His profile picture has changed -- he's alone now. His cover photo has changed as well -- though he's still with his girlfriend.

But I'm not that frustrated anymore. Really! I just feel like, "Okay." And I think that's just really the way it is. Then I suddenly remembered:

"One can only move on once the wound is healed."

Mine is already healing -- or should I say, "healed already"? Because I think, yes -- I'm moving on.

It's my Day -- simple yet fulfilling!

I need neither expensive gifts nor big surprises or any special celebrations, because just knowing that someone remembers and thinks of my day can already move me... and it's more than enough.

I have this hidden agenda that I did beforehand. I didn't talk to anybody about my upcoming birthday. I even purposely hid my birth date in my facebook profile.

Well, it is not because I don't want anybody to know that I'm already getting old -- I don't really care about me being no longer a "teen" -- or I don't want to treat anybody -- I actually planned to treat some (of course just only some -- I'm not a rich person and I'm not yet earning my own money) important people by surprise.

It is because I don't want to be flooded by greetings publicly. So non-sense, but that's the truth. I just really want a silent birthday. And one more thing, I somewhat want to know who are the people who can really remember my day.

And yesterday, my 2 best friends from high school -- Abegail, the one having a family already, and Sheena, the other one who is also still studying like me -- texted me. They greeted me in advance. Seems like they already know and remember my day by heart. I really love them.

Today, Raymar, another best friend from high school also sent his greetings, in FB messenger and K, a friend from elementary in twitter.
  

Still, nobody can defeat one's own family.

 Look at this one: a single flower like me...

This was given to me by ANA two days ago. Yes, two days before my birthday and yet she already made me happy. Not just that. When I asked her why flower, she said: "It was what you have said before. You said, you want to receive a flower on your birthday..." I couldn't even remember that I said that before, but she did.

This morning, the first message that I read in my phone was from our Mommy. It says, "Happy birthday. Wish you luck, child. God bless you!"

Then, Daddy tried to call me as well. It was just that I sounded hoarse due to some cough and colds so I wasn't able to talk to him.

Ate greeted me just upon waking up. She invited me to go to some places (SM, Divisoria). I just didn't really feel like going out -- as usual.

Kuya was the one who treated for our food. We have Jollibee for our lunch, bought by ANA -- and ice cream during dinner. 
 

And the most memorable part of today...

is when I was able to attend the Sunday mass.

Honestly, it was really a long time ago since I was able to go to the Church -- and I consider it as one of the most hateful part of me. So, today was really a remarkable one. I feel like it's really my birthday and I was reborn.
 

So...

That's it, and I feel like I already have a fulfilling day! I need not several people to make my day so special and to make me happy. Just such little things are enough.

Mission accomplished!

Just passed our thesis this afternoon...

After almost 5 or 6 months, finally no more worries!

Why?

I admit, I liked him right from the start -- from the very first day I knew him.

And yes, after that, I wanted to get his phone number. I wanted to add him on Facebook. By all means, I wanted to be close to him -- by having a communication between us.

But I never did anything.

The time I got a chance, I wasn't able to stop myself anymore. I searched his FB. Though it was a little bit hard, I did find it.

But then there it went -- I saw his profile picture and cover photo -- which stunned me -- and hurt me --  and eventually cause me to stupidly cry that night and made my eyes got inflamed the next morning. I didn't send him a friend request.

SIGHS

The following days, I wasn't my normal self anymore. I decided to act casually -- or should I say cold -- around him. I stopped interacting with him first --  even greeting him when he or I arrived. I stopped showing any emotions to him -- not any reactions whenever he talks -- not even a little smile when he jokes or teases me. During those days, I tried so hard to stop myself from liking him.

However, as the days passed, I simply couldn't anymore. I simply couldn't just continue my little hard act anymore. Soon, just like the very days before I knew the hurtful "truth", I started to show myself in front of him again. I let my guard down again. It was because I couldn't just help but be flattered of his words. I couldn't just throw a poker face because just his mere presence could really make me smile. What I thought was, he didn't even know that I like him -- he didn't even know that I was upset -- he knew nothing -- and he would never know anything -- so what was the point of all my actions?

And I forgot and leave the "truth".

Until the day that he had to leave, I gave him a remembrance  -- and that was a handkerchief. A HANDKERCHIEF -- which is a very symbolical thing for me. I only give handkerchief as a gift for those special persons -- special persons for me.

After he was gone, I became like a stalker. I kept on visiting his FB everytime I got a chance -- still considering if I should add him as friend or not -- and this wasn't just once or twice.

I was until today -- I saw and read their public conversations... the whole conversations... their sweet whole conversations...

And now I realized, I really have to stop.

What a shame. What a foolish of me. Making an inspiration out of someone with other inspiration -- that eventhough I already knew it, I still continued. Not that it was bad, but it wasn't good either -- 'coz I just made myself hurt... and hurt again... and hurt more... Why did I put salt to my own wound? Why -- even I already know that it was salt -- did I even started and continued?

Now, I have thought I would just consider it as an infatuation -- just like how I considered my other previous experiences as one... and just move on -- just like how I moved on from my other previous experiences.

But what can I do? It hurts. It really does hurts! 'Coz if it was just an infatuation, why then... why of all other several people... why does it have to be with someone already taken?

So Odd

Just bought another handkerchief -- one which is exactly the same as the one I gave him.

By the way, haven't I mentioned yesterday that I met new people, as in new co-interns? Well, they are the new batch that replaced G's batch. G's batch have already left. They have already completed their internship here at MCU-FDTMF hospital. I haven't really explained but I have at least mentioned before that they are our senior co-interns. That is, because they started ahead of us -- much ahead. It is because in their school, their internship is for 10 months and they have 2 ins -- I mean, they will have their internship for 2 different hospitals, 5 months each, unlike us, who have only 1 in but for 6 months. So the new ins that I have met yesterday are from different hospital, and they already completed  their first in there.

So... I hate it.

I think I really miss him.

I can't even help visiting his facebook timeline every time I have a chance (but he's not my FB friend okay?). I can't, even though I keep on getting hurt -- because he's actually with a girl in both his profile picture and cover photo.

Almost a 360 Degree Turn

First day in Histopathology section!

It's my 2nd post, and we're on our 5th week of internship now.

Well, it was supposedly yesterday but I called it off because I still felt exhausted from my previous temporary post by then.

So anyway, I got mixed feelings about this rotation. It was our first rotation -- not mentioning our temporary post before this.

I feel EXCITED -- knowing that I will experience new things...

but NERVOUS as well -- thinking that I'm like a new intern -- back to zero -- knowing nothing in a whole new world...

HAPPY -- being able to escape from the main lab somehow -- because Histopath section is separated, not just by room but by building...

but at the same time LONELY -- missing it in some points, along with other people there -- I mean my co-interns, which are also my classmates/schoolmates & friends -- and some staffs...

And most of all FULL OF EXPECTATIONS -- having the idea brought by those who are from this post -- that Histopath section is the best best best post among all.


By the way, today I was able to meet new people: co-interns MKPS, SM & ECSE (new ins) -- and staffs Ma'am AH, Ma'am LP, Sir FBJ (well I actually know them already because I usually visit my friends in this section even when my post was still on the main lab) & Ma'am MD.

And... I've done good so far. I was able to learn and to accomplish new routine tasks in one day. Well of course these are not all -- just some; hence, looking forward to learn and to apply the rest soon. Also, gonna really have to see the rest of my days in this post for myself!

NBSB

I'm not interested in suitors. I dodge having one. I don't like it.

For me, just befriending the boys around me is enough. I'm contented with my girlfriends. I'm happy being single -- for exactly 19 years and 11 months of my existence here in the world. Hahaha.

I don't actually hate guys... but I don't like them either.
--- though honestly, I'm not really like this before... not before some sort of "experiences".
 
I actually get flattered easily. One of my weaknesses is my eyes. Usually when I look at someone else' eyes, I'm gonna feel something already. Well, I mean it's what catches me -- the longer I look, the deeper I'll be attach. It is most especially in case of an eye-to-eye contact -- because it affects me more! That's why I always avoid eye-to-eye contacts with a guy (another side of me unveiled).

So the thing is: BOYS COME AND GO. They love to start, but they can't keep... till the end. Frankly, they do really END!


 I admit, I'm a hard-to-get type of girl.

The scene goes like this:

There is this girl. There is this boy. The boy offers some hints to the girl. The courtship begins. Along the way, the girl's still not gonna give in yet she starts to like the boy. The girl wants to see how the boy's gonna go further to pursue her just to make sure he's serious. Then when she's ready, the boy's nowhere. To realize, the boy's not really serious. For a short period of time, END.


I admit, I'm a very insecure type of girl.

Another scene goes like this:

There is this girl. There is this boy. The girl actually likes the boy. Suddenly the boy makes his move. Even if the girl have mutual feelings towards the boy, she will pretend not to be interested in the boy. Again, it is because the girl wants to see how the boy's gonna go further to pursue her just to make sure he's serious. Then when she's ready, she will know other girl (s) who like (s) the same boy. Regardless of ALL, she gets insecure. END.


Is it bad to be such type of girl? I can't do anything about it. It's my personality.

But I think it's only natural to act like one, am I right? And so the boy just must do anything to break this wall, isn't it? Or am I the only one with such mentality?

I don't think I'm too much of it. It's just within the level. So is the problem still about me?

Whatever it is, I don't really hate guys. I just don't trust them... not anymore.

So blabbering. So lack of one word. So disappointing. They just give heartbreaks. They just make eyes water. They just make me love my pillow more and more.

So now, when I feel that someone's making a move, I make my own move as well before he can even start what he's planning. What's the move? To push them away. I don't say a word. I don't talk. But I'm gonna show that I'm not interested. It's all in my actions. And this move of mine always works. ALWAYS WORKS.

Maybe someday... Something's gonna change... At the right time... At the right place... With the right person... Maybe... Someday...

3rd week of Internship

09/15

First time to work with Ma'am DJA. Didn't have a chance to do bleeding. She is so strict.

Another person added on my list. I met Ma'am T! ;)

I've got a hateful PIMPLE!!!!!

Worse, FLOOD! So we just rode the LRT.

09/16-17

ILL -- still, but I never skip my duty.

I even got so much embarrassment these last few days, so I feel very blue.

09/18

Ma'am MGC talked to me… My impression to her changed somehow.

I saw her, yeah. And I felt like I was really afraid of her. I wanted to apologize but was too shy to approach her. I still can't get over it. I still feel blue, depressed and sad.

The good thing, Ma'am CDGM was our staff. Love it! No donor though. But I have done several ABO and Rh.

2nd week of Internship

09/10

I failed one venipuncture. I failed in bleeding. My self-esteem was totally depressed.

Another mistake: Never leave a phone call without knowing the complete details about it. I just did. Okay, first, I know how to answer a phone call. The thing, I have no idea about the caller's inquiry, and there was no one at immediate area to rescue me. Of course, being a newbie in panic -- or that was only me? -- anyway, I left the phone on hold and looked for anyone. The problem, the moment my back up came, the caller hanged up already. This back up suddenly asked me what was the call all about. I have nothing to answer. Haha. So stupid. I hate the caller. Hehe.

I realized, one can avoid neither scolding nor embarrassment for this internship.

09/11

Blood letting.

Of us, three on duty interns today, I was left alone in the blood bank while my 2 post mates were brought along at the hospital 6th floor -- the main location for the bloodletting today. Not bad. I felt free again. Our staff for today was Ma'am JMB -- and she was up there as well. Hehe.

The bad thing, I was the only one -- as in the only one -- on the blood bank. I worried what if there would be some any problem or what, and I didn’t know what to do. Just thankful, the day passed without any big drama. Haha.

Anyway, the bloodletting today is a program of the medical students of MCU, the school of this hospital. About the workload, of course, I was able to do some help as well. Some of the donors were sent on blood bank so I was the one who took care of them. There were just some kind of little pressure since our donors are medical students!!!!! And take note, some of them have medical technology as pre-med!!!!

By the way, felt okay because I managed not to be so excited to see him.

09/12-13

OFF - BORED TO DEATH.

09/13-14

ILL TO DEATH.

But still I went on duty on 14. That was when I heard the love story of Ma'am CDGM and his husband. Ma'am CDGM was the one who told the story herself. His husband was a blood donor and she was the staff on duty on that day. The guy said he would wait for her 'til she finished her shift and that was where it all began! Hahaha!So sweet!!! I even learned that their story is known among all the hospital employees. Why? Well, that is because before, she was awarded as the most hospitable-friendliest-nicest-something like that employee, and during the awarding ceremony, the presenter introduced her by telling that she even got her husband because of her pleasing personality! Hahaha!

First time to work with Gh, so much embarrassment. I'm not gonna tell the story.

1st week of Internship

09/05

1st day in post. And my first post is Blood Bank.

New environment. New faces. New interactions. Where I'm not good at. New routine. Need a BIG BIG BIG BIG BIG ADAPTATION!!!!! Thanks to AJM and most especially to him [blushing]. I kinda feel like I like him. [blushing more]. I can't help feeling tickled pink when I'm thinking of him. Agh!! So embarrassing to admit! Nice meeting him. Just a little disappointment that I wasn't able to get his contact #! I want to be friends with him, even outside duty! At first I didn't really know his name, couldn't understand it even after AJM have already introduced him to me. But I got to know it after seeing the schedule posted in our bulletin. So it was G... As in Earth. Hehe.
 

09/06

2nd day in post.

7 am to 7 pm. NO BREAK! So tired. So exhausted. But prepared somehow. I got excited and inspired for this day because I knew I would get to see him again [blushing]. But after he left after his shift… ='( so sad ='(

I felt a little embarrassed for some of my mistakes, especially when I broke 1 glass tube while making my first RCS.

I felt a little nervous when Ma'am JMB asked something about our work. Not that I really didn't know but I was not actually sure about what I would gonna say. Good that I was not the one asked but my other companions ;) or else I would get more embarrassed… in front of him!!!

Nervous. Afraid. Tense. Especially when Ma'am gets into not mood. So scary!!!

Oh by the way, I got to know his full name! I saw in his laboratory gown. Gonna find his facebook ;) but when I have time [blushing].

One thing that made me feel very flattered today. "I thought you're a doctor!"  These were the words of some of our blood donors -- take note, different persons. Do I look like one now? Hahaha!

09/07

3rd day in post.

Met more people -- other staffs, personnels, and interns. Became even more close, hence, more comfortable with my senior co-interns. Just so sad that he was off.

But generally, I love today! I felt free! Ma'am JMB was off! ;)

I realized, what is difficult in our tasks is not our tasks per se. Instead, familiarizing with all the persons, technical jargon of the hospital-lab and the locations of wards.

And oh! Donors today are not as nice as yesterday's!

Got to know new places -- places to eat.

09/08

4th day in post. My 1st Sunday duty.

Excited to go to duty now 'coz I know he's also on duty. However, I felt bad as soon as I saw him, because when I smiled at him (well, not actually smile), he shook his head like " tsk tsk tsk". Felt like he doesn't like me arriving or what. I don't know.

Ma'am JMB was not our staff for today again! =) Ma'am PP was -- which is a first time. Though I was glad that I wouldn’t be working under Ma'am JMB today, I was not as glad as yesterday when our staff is Ma'am CDGM. I was tensed around Ma'am PP. I even mistaken other staff as her! Gosh!

I feel like becoming more familiar with the hospital wards now. I suddenly remembered the first time I was toured around the hospital -- by him.

I wasn't able to perform venipuncture today, but bleeding several! 24 bled donors so far. Just so disappointed that I wasn't successful in one.
 

09/09

It's Monday but I'm not as busy as my other siblings. I'm off today.

Got time to surf the internet. I looked for his FB -- the thing I have planned several days ago, but I found free time only today.

Gosh! I'm hurt! I'm upset! Really upset! He is with a girl in his profile picture! Even in his cover photo! Is she his girlfriend? Of course she is not his sister! God! I'm so curious! Then I suddenly want to cry. I feel like I really wanna cry. And my eyes became wet. I cry. I don't know. My tears just flow down.

After that, I reminded myself. I'm in that hospital for internship -- for training -- and not for anything else… not anything else.

Such a Long - Short Day

It was our first day in the hospital, but we went to school first to get back the files that we have submitted in the Medical Technology office before because we must bring those files along when we go to the hospital -- which annoyed me a little -- because if not only for that, we wouldn't have to bother ourselves about leaving home earlier or about going to school first instead of just going directly to the hospital -- if only they reminded as beforehand, not just the night before the day we were about to go to the hospital. That just pissed me off.

However, it was still a good thing since we were able to go to the hospital together -- our group -- not all of us though. We even have a time to eat before we leave. Furthermore, it was more convenient, since honestly, I still didn't know the exact way to the hospital. I and MLA were actually planning to go visit the place beforehand but we were too late. It was already the day set for our hospital orientation.

At school while waiting for our files to be returned to us, our clinical instructors acted like they were sending school their "children" for the first time. They kept reminding us to be good, to stay humble, to not cause any troubles in the first day, to fix ourselves -- Sir JM actually prepared nail cutter, acetone and cotton for those ones wearing nail polishes and for those ones with long nails. Unfortunately, I'm one of the latter -- but just my pinky fingernails. Bitterly, I cut my pinky fingernails.

On our way to the hospital, I met EDS! She is one of my "daughters". I was so happy.

So in the hospital.. in the laboratory.. in the conference room..

Orient. Orient. Orient. Orient.

Then our clinical instructor, Sir PR came. Again, I really felt like a preschooler who was being send to the nursery school because reminders were keep flowing and pouring. I mean it -- but in a good way. I felt good. I actually missed the feeling of being taken cared of -- as a dependent little child -- now that I have really grown up.

And so, we also have a short tour around the laboratory.

Well, I don't know! I really don't know! I felt so alienated during those times. But whatever.

At the end of the day, expectations were replaced by first impressions and realizations.Some were the same. Some were a little different. Well, to think, it was just the first day. We still have 6 months to check it out more.

New Fangirl Here

Got a new interest...

ONE DIRECTION!

These last few days, I've been busy surfing the internet looking for all 1D songs. Hopefully, I have completed all their albums and extended plays already. I even checked their songs' lyrics.

Then today, I just watched all their performances in the The X Factor, where their career started. Well, don't ask why only now.

I took time to be familiar and to memorize their faces and names. Now I do.

Louis William Tomlinson

Zain Javadd "Zayn" Malik

Liam James Payne

Niall James Horan

Harry Edward Styles

I followed their personal accounts in twitter. Oh my -- I was really hooked to them.

Knowing my personality, I don't get easily interested in anything -- but when I do, I really do get persistent.

It's so nice to have a new interest... and so a new inspiration -- something to look forward to.

Orientation

Internship is not a vacation. Internship is hardship.

Almost a week after enrollment and hospital assignments, we went back to school today for our internship orientation.

Well, this last few days, I'm actually feeling a little bit sad. What's bothering me is... I'm gonna miss him. We have different hospital assignments. It's not that I'm not gonna see him anymore 'coz we still have our seminar, which is the day that we will go to school so I still have a chance to see him. However, it's still different from seeing him everyday. So, I tried hard to act and to speak casually while ago when we were talking -- but deep inside, I'm really sad.

So by the way, this is the first time that interns of the same hospital assignment were gathered. As to our group -- MCU group -- majority actually came from our section so there was really no big adjustments regarding knowing each others. We were able to have some good conversations and sharing of thoughts about this and that. What amazed me is some of us seemed like they were given a hint about their hospital assignment 'coz some of them was once confined there. Just like that and wow.

Dr. EM-II, our clinical coordinator gave us a really great talk about this internship thing. I actually voice recorded his (or her? haha) lecture orientation -- though I wasn't able to record from the very beginning, but still good enough to have a keepsake of this day.

It's happening

Hospital assignments for our internship have just been posted.

And here's where I gonna spend my 6 months training (credits to the owner for the photo):

 Manila Central University Filemon D. Tanchoco Medical Foundation Hospital 

I'm getting nervous. This internship thing is just starting to sink in to me. I don't know what really to do.

It's just good that I have others from our block that are assigned on the same hospital as mine.

And there is she, MLA, my classmate in freshmen year, as well as in junior's -- and even up to now in our senior's. To think, in one year we have 2 semesters -- which are almost equivalent to one school year each, because each marks a beginning of classes. Meaning, we're like in the same block for almost 6 school years!

It's not planned. I mean, being stuck together in the same section for that long isn't something that's gonna happen just because one wants.

1st year, 1st sem. Who the hell knew who were we gonna have as classmates by then. It was random, of course. We were just like different pieces meeting for the first time, coming together in one place to complete some puzzle.

1st year, 2nd sem. That was it when we have a choice by then, and we chose to be in the same block again.

2nd year, 1st sem. Still, we have a choice but conflicts occurred. I enrolled late and so we got separated.

2nd year, 2nd sem. Still, I decided to just go along with my classmates in the previous sem. And that made a total of one year of us in different blocks.

And there now, we were about to enter our 3rd year. Things turned. We couldn't just choose freely anymore like during our first 2 years in college. It was already grade- and exam-based. Unexpectedly, we became classmates... again. Chances got us back together.

Which continued until our 4th year, 1st sem.

And now 4th year, 2nd sem. This hospital assignment? Several things were considered here. But still, we saw our names on the same sheet of paper in the post. She even said,

 "We're like conjoined twins."

Well, it just happens. I think we're really gonna have to stay in each other's back... for some more time.

Just enrolled!

11 days since I last wore my uniform. 11 days since I last went to school.

Today, we just enrolled!

Here goes our new schedule:

But the day and hour for our internship thing here is still temporary because it will still depend on the availability of our hospital assignments.

Wooooh! I really have mix feelings about this.

Next Club

It was so soon -- sooner than I never thought.

Abegail is one of my closest among my closest friends during high school. Since we are so afar from each other -- she in the province while me here in the city, I haven't heard so much news about her during these last few years (well, except for some friend request accepted and profile picture changed updates in Facebook). Our last interaction, I can't remember already. I'm trying to reach her by phone recently but I think she is too busy to give a reply. She started working almost 2 years ago.

Just suddenly today, she texted me:

"How are you now? I have a spouse now. We already have baby. I expect to give labor next month... You and Sheena (another closest among my closest friend) will be godparents, okay?"

I didn't know! That gave me a shock. Really. I mean, I didn't expected it. It was such a random random random news I got directly from her!

My mind went blank first. Then, I thought. I weighed my feelings.

HAPPY? Just like others receiving a good news from someone dear? Love! Baby! Family! Yeah! A good news! And how come this very thin fragile girl before turned into a wife and mother so suddenly?

SAD? She's no longer "our" Abegail anymore. She's "someone else" now.

EXCITED? I'll be a godparent! And that child of hers -- her first child -- is gonna be my first godchild!

SULK? Why does this close friend of ours notified us so late? I mean, we didn't even got a chance to meet that guy and give her an impression about him -- that guy who stole our girlfriend from us  -- some friendship courtesy or rules like that, you know?

JUDGING? She and that unknown guy aren't really married yet actually; just living in. Well still, we're already at our right age to make decisions like that.

After sometime then, I replied her:

"Wow! Really? Congratulations! I'm so happy for you!"

I just realized, she really have joined the next club already. She's really so ahead in true life. She have become so independent now.  And I'm so envious of her. I don't think I can be like her yet.

Just for him

I'm not a fashionista.

I mean, I'm not the type of girl who pays so much attention to my physical look: clothing, accessories, whatsoever.

At home, I just wear a pair of t-shirt and shorts, with matching flip flops. At school, of course I'm on our regular white uniform and black shoes. Outside other than school, hmmm... honestly, I'm just a house-and-school-only gal. But for casual basis -- for example, going to the market to buy some necessities like foods and soaps and the like or to pay some bills -- my preference goes with, if not those what I wear inside the house, just simple loose blouses and pants along with some flats for my footwear. One more thing, I don't do make ups -- just a little face power and lip moisturizer -- at least some missy thing, you know.

And so, this is me. I'm just a plain, boring, common girl on a corner.

But, know what? I just dolled up myself today. And here's what I just wore for some time:

 

This, I match up with some black blazer -- which I have failed to include in the photo.

Not so elegant or flashy, but completely incomparable to my usual clothes.

It's not that I never wore such clothes before. But what I'm trying to say is there's no even any kind of celebration.

It's actually for our thesis defense.

But thesis defense isn't really something one should be prepared for so much -- well, of course except for the thesis itself. Corporate Dress - as simply instructed to us.

Still, I especially prepared for it.

I just actually bought this dress and 3 inches heels yesterday -- me, who's also not a fond buyer, except for food -- me, who seldom spend money for "wants" and even for "needs" unless really needed -- me, who will not be able to have any new personal stuffs like clothes or shoes unless someone will bought or give me.

Then why? Honestly, it is because... you know... just like other typical teens out there... who wants to look pretty... in the eyes of their crush... Hahaha. And now I think I'm blushing.

Quite a Long Journey... somehow

AUGUST 3, SATURDAY. Last day of our classes.

AUGUST 8, THURSDAY. Last day of our final major exams.

AUGUST 12, MONDAY. Promotion board.

TODAY? AUGUST 13, TUESDAY. And I just went to school.

I went there to confirm the half-uncertain-half-sure news I just received yesterday. And it was real. It was confirmed by my own eyes.

4th year, 1st semester. We passed! We passed! We passed! We passed!

Hooray!

Now, I just dig up for our course syllabus and I feel so proud of myself. I can't barely believe it. I just realized that it's been really a quite long journey somehow -- though I'm just referring to our college life.

Just take a look below. These are all our subject courses that we were able to take up to reach where we are now. I have sorted it out by relevance and also, I have marked those ones considered as major among our major subjects, or maybe I should say important ones since those are included in our board exam.

And now 4th year, 2nd semester. We're already going for INTERNSHIP! Well, of course it is along with our Seminar 2. And then, just this only one semester left and we're graduating! Really so excited.

Hahaha. I almost forgot that we still have one thing left to be fixed before this semester's closure. It's our THESIS DEFENSE. This is for next week. And so, another God bless for us. I know we can do it. Just another little push again... and LET'S GO!

Greetings for FT Island

I've been a Primadonna since 2010. Now it's been 3 years.

And today, FT Island is celebrating their 6th anniversary. Hence I've prepared, though not so big but still a sincere 'something' for them. Just wishing and hoping this will be able to reach them.

To my dearest FTISLAND:

Choi Jong Hun, Lee Hong Ki, Lee Jae Jin, Choi Min Hwan, Song Seung Hyun:

You've come this far now. I just want to tell that I'm so proud to be a Primadonna. Thank you for the music. Thank you for the inspiration.

And though it's quite a long voyage now, I still want to continue this journey with you. Please stay with us. More power, God bless and Happy 6th anniversary!

Coincidental

Yes, it's maybe just a toothbrush -- just an ordinary toothbrush. But for me, it's not just as simple as that...

May 12. It's our first overnight for our group research. Perhaps, my 2nd time to sleep over in college, but my 1st for this year.

Of all essential personal things one must remember to bring, I forgot my toothbrush.

At our sleep over place. Work. Work. Work. Then suddenly, some of us decided to go buy some food.

When they arrived, he suddenly showed me something and told me,

"Here. You forgot your toothbrush, didn't you?"

I was a little bit astonished. Then I remembered, I have managed to mention that to him while we were still on our way. Well, that alone made me feel thankful and very happy somehow, knowing that he remembered what I have told him.

Then, I looked at it. I was even more surprised. I realized that it was exactly the same as my current toothbrush.

That was it. And I thought, that was just too coincidental -- just too coincidental... which really flattered me.