1st week of Internship

09/05

1st day in post. And my first post is Blood Bank.

New environment. New faces. New interactions. Where I'm not good at. New routine. Need a BIG BIG BIG BIG BIG ADAPTATION!!!!! Thanks to AJM and most especially to him [blushing]. I kinda feel like I like him. [blushing more]. I can't help feeling tickled pink when I'm thinking of him. Agh!! So embarrassing to admit! Nice meeting him. Just a little disappointment that I wasn't able to get his contact #! I want to be friends with him, even outside duty! At first I didn't really know his name, couldn't understand it even after AJM have already introduced him to me. But I got to know it after seeing the schedule posted in our bulletin. So it was G... As in Earth. Hehe.
 

09/06

2nd day in post.

7 am to 7 pm. NO BREAK! So tired. So exhausted. But prepared somehow. I got excited and inspired for this day because I knew I would get to see him again [blushing]. But after he left after his shift… ='( so sad ='(

I felt a little embarrassed for some of my mistakes, especially when I broke 1 glass tube while making my first RCS.

I felt a little nervous when Ma'am JMB asked something about our work. Not that I really didn't know but I was not actually sure about what I would gonna say. Good that I was not the one asked but my other companions ;) or else I would get more embarrassed… in front of him!!!

Nervous. Afraid. Tense. Especially when Ma'am gets into not mood. So scary!!!

Oh by the way, I got to know his full name! I saw in his laboratory gown. Gonna find his facebook ;) but when I have time [blushing].

One thing that made me feel very flattered today. "I thought you're a doctor!"  These were the words of some of our blood donors -- take note, different persons. Do I look like one now? Hahaha!

09/07

3rd day in post.

Met more people -- other staffs, personnels, and interns. Became even more close, hence, more comfortable with my senior co-interns. Just so sad that he was off.

But generally, I love today! I felt free! Ma'am JMB was off! ;)

I realized, what is difficult in our tasks is not our tasks per se. Instead, familiarizing with all the persons, technical jargon of the hospital-lab and the locations of wards.

And oh! Donors today are not as nice as yesterday's!

Got to know new places -- places to eat.

09/08

4th day in post. My 1st Sunday duty.

Excited to go to duty now 'coz I know he's also on duty. However, I felt bad as soon as I saw him, because when I smiled at him (well, not actually smile), he shook his head like " tsk tsk tsk". Felt like he doesn't like me arriving or what. I don't know.

Ma'am JMB was not our staff for today again! =) Ma'am PP was -- which is a first time. Though I was glad that I wouldn’t be working under Ma'am JMB today, I was not as glad as yesterday when our staff is Ma'am CDGM. I was tensed around Ma'am PP. I even mistaken other staff as her! Gosh!

I feel like becoming more familiar with the hospital wards now. I suddenly remembered the first time I was toured around the hospital -- by him.

I wasn't able to perform venipuncture today, but bleeding several! 24 bled donors so far. Just so disappointed that I wasn't successful in one.
 

09/09

It's Monday but I'm not as busy as my other siblings. I'm off today.

Got time to surf the internet. I looked for his FB -- the thing I have planned several days ago, but I found free time only today.

Gosh! I'm hurt! I'm upset! Really upset! He is with a girl in his profile picture! Even in his cover photo! Is she his girlfriend? Of course she is not his sister! God! I'm so curious! Then I suddenly want to cry. I feel like I really wanna cry. And my eyes became wet. I cry. I don't know. My tears just flow down.

After that, I reminded myself. I'm in that hospital for internship -- for training -- and not for anything else… not anything else.